Wasted the best part of a day yesterday watching a Netflix show called Instant Hotel, which is like an Australian version of Four In A Bed, only instead of crappy B&Bs in fading, drizzly seaside towns like Margate, it’s set in places with actual sunshine like Byron Bay and the Gold Coast.
Basically, it’s people who own Airbnb type properties competing to see who owns the best one, with them all staying in each other’s places. I’m not keen on the Airbnb phenomenon, for a variety of reasons, but at least some of these places are family homes where they’re renting out rooms for a bit of extra cash.
The opening spiel promised an astonishing range of diversity, and I’m not sure about that, but highlights include:
- A man with a mullet. In 2018. An actual mullet. Australia you are everything they claim you to be.
- Jumping crocodiles near a town called Humpty Doo.
- A guy called Sturt. Not a typo. Sturt.
- Competitive scheming by people who do not have enough brain cells to competently pull off the competitive scheming.
- Much drama. Wow.
- A woman (called Babe, apparently) who lives in Bondi Beach and is so obsessed with the place she named her daughter Bondi.
- People shitting on other places and hyping up their own place, only for their place to be a massive letdown for other contestants and viewer alike.
- Seriously don’t go on about how luxurious your place is when it apparently smells like cat wee and mould due to the cats and the indoor water feature with bonus algae.
- A handful of couples just there for the craic, letting the drama wash over them and enjoying the free holidays.
- Presented by the Australian Dermot O’Leary.
It’s just…you should watch it. It’s worth it for the locations alone.
